Don’t Just Count Your Blessings…

My sister-in-law's mom, Ruth, died last week. She had been ill for some time and required 24/7 healthcare. She spent the last week of her life calling old friends and writing thank-you notes to those who had cared for her over the last several years. It seems to me that she died the way she lived – counting more than just her blessings.

Ruth's wonderful life teaches me that it is easy to be thankful when things go my way, but hard when people or circumstances fail to meet my expectations. Ruth wasn’t thankful just for her blessings, she was thankFULL for everything.

It is also easy to mourn someone with tears, but hard to honor them with action. This holiday season, I'll try to honor Ruth by practicing what she lived – being thankful all the time. Here are a few examples of “difficulties” for which I choose to be thankful:

1. Traffic

2. Dirty dishes

3. Tough times

1. Traffic
I hear people complaining about traffic and long commutes all the time. Of course, Los Angeles traffic bothers me too at times. Yet, it was those hours in traffic that drove me to turn my car into a rolling university 25 years ago when I worked for Siemens. I've listened to thousands of hours of educational audio programs during long commutes, traffic jams, and airport delays. I attribute a significant portion of my “success” to my dedication to lifelong learning… in my car and elsewhere. I invite you to check out www.teach12.com and learn from the best teachers in the world.

2. Dirty dishes
I used to hate washing dishes. My attitude changed one year when I realized that Ruth couldn't do the dishes because of her failing health. In that moment I decided that dirty dishes, especially during the holidays, represented an abundance of food, friends, and family. There are many who do not experience abundance during the holiday season. Those serving in our armed forces, suffering ill health, dying of hunger across the globe would do anything to wash dishes after a Thanksgiving meal with us. I encourage you to dirty a few extra dishes this holiday season by inviting someone who may have no place to go.

3. Tough times
The essence of growth is the management of anxiety during tough times. Nature, life, and research all teach us that hardship is critical to leadership. The ocean's reef is more spectacular on the side where the waves crash; those who fail to learn from difficulties are doomed to repeat them; eXtraordinary leaders understand that 70% of professional development occurs during challenging assignments.

Our challenging economy continues to cause anxiety in many hearts and homes. I too was anxious, especially at the start of the year after losing my largest (banking) client. I channeled my anxiety into positive energy by creating my new website (http://www.DaveJensenOnLeadership.com/) and the eXpansive Leadership Model (XLM) assessment tool (http://xlmassessment.com/). I am very thankful that these have been instrumental in the upswing in my business this year. It may be a stretch to say I am “thankful” for tough times, but it’s not a stretch to say that I’m choosing to GROW through tough times instead of merely going through them.

The holidays begin by giving thanks. I'm thankful that Ruth touched my heart. I am thankful that she taught me to count all things, not just my blessings. How about you?

Keep eXpanding,
Dave

P.S. Click on the link below (or paste it into your browser) to read about how my research on 171,000 leaders:

http://davejensenonleadership.com/XLMHoweXceptionalLeadersAchieveeXtraordinaryResults.html

Put Research in YOUR Leadership

I recently commented on a blog, asking the author if he had any research behind his opinions. Here’s his response:

No, it's not a hypothesis, this isn't a classroom, I'm not an academian, and I don't do research. I blog about my experience in the real world; that's really all I'm even marginally qualified to discuss. If it rings true, try it. If not, don't. Some companies even pay me for it. Go figure.

What do you think of his answer? Let me ask you a few other quick questions:

1. How much time, money, effort… do you spend trying other peoples’ ideas in an attempt to improve your situation (i.e., conducting your own "experiments")?
2. How do you know their ideas will work for you?
3. Is there a way to increase the probability that all your time, money, and effort trying new ideas will result in success?
4. If so, how?
5. In 100 years, you’re probably going to be dead. Since you’re going to be dead for a very long time, how many grains of sand (i.e., precious minutes of your life) should you let slip through your hourglass because your tried ideas without any evidence to predict success?
6. Is it my ethical obligation as an educator to teach ideas that research predicts will work, thus honoring your grains of time?

Here are my answers:

1. For most people, organizations, and governments… A LOT.
2. Most of the time, you don’t.
3. Yes, but the approach only increases the probability you get results. There’s no guarantee.
4. Try only those ideas that have some science to back them. The essence of science/research is prediction. And aren’t you really predicting things will get better as a result of trying something?
5. Zero
6. For me, yes.

Thank you.
Be eXtraordinary as you pursue what is true,

Dave Jensen
http://www.DaveJensenOnLeadership.com

P.S. The web-based eXpansive Leadership Method (XLM) Assessment is based on my analysis of research covering 171,000 leaders. Within minutes of completing your assessment (which takes less than 20 minutes to fill out), you can download your highly personalized profile - a comprehensive, 21 + page report and customized action plan in PDF format. Go to: http://xlmassessment.com/ to read about the 360 assessment.

How Leaders Do the Right Thing

Uncle Burt reached into his back pocket and pulled out his wallet. He fumbled for another five dollar bill and then slapped it on the bar. He directed his soft, raspy voice toward the bartender, "When you get a chance, get my nephew another beer."

As he settled back onto his seat, I blurted, "Burt, I got my draft card yesterday." The year was was 1973 and the Vietnam War was winding down, but the draft was alive and well.

"Well, what are you going to do?" The war-decorated Marine’s blue eyes stared at me.

"I don't want to go to Vietnam and die. Don't we have relatives in Sweden or Denmark?" So there, I said it to a man who was my second father, a former Marine and whose eldest son - cousin Dean - was also a Marine.

"You're not going to go to Sweden or Denmark, Dave."

"I'm not? Why not?" I really hadn't decided anything.

"Because," he put his muscular left arm around me, squeezed hard and smiled, "you're always going to do the right thing."

I wish I could tell you that Uncle Burt was right - that I've always done the right thing. But I haven't. I've tried to do the right thing, but I've made many mistakes. (I never had to make a decision about the Vietnam War, the war ended before my number was called.) Here are a three practical guidelines that philosophers from Socrates to Uncle Burt have used to help do the right thing.

1. The VIRTUE Approach
This traditional approach to ethics teaches us that a leader's decision should be consistent with specific virtues. These virtues enable us to act according to the highest potential of our character. A virtuous leader asks, "What kind of person will I become if I do this?" or "Is this action consistent with my acting at my best?" The research suggests that you and your team profit as you practice the virtues of honesty, integrity, equity, and humility.

2. The UTILITARIAN Approach
Employing the utilitarian approach to making ethical decisions means that your aim is to produce the greatest good and least harm for all those who are affected by your decision. This often includes weighing the impact of your decisions on the many stakeholders who often have conflicting interests, such as your customers, employees, shareholders, the community, and the environment. Utilitarian leaders consider the consequences of decisions by asking, "How can this decision produce the greatest good and least harm."

3. The COMMON GOOD Approach
Similar to the utilitarian approach, the common good emphasizes the impact of decisions on the larger community. Philosopher Immanuel Kant’s categorical imperative addresses this by stating: "Act only according to that maxim by which you can, at the same time, will that it should become a universal law of nature." In other words, the common good approach invites leaders to ask, “If everybody here was compelled to do what I'm about to do, how would it affect the environment?”

These are three fundamental approaches to help you become a more ethical leader. Perhaps if more leaders applied them, the world economy would be in better shape. Which ones will be most useful to you?

Keep eXpanding... ethically,

Dave

How Leaders Apply Ethics Every Day

Would you describe yourself as an ethical leader? If so, what values drive your ethics? How do you apply those values in your everyday decision-making? This article will address these questions in a very practical manner.

Whether you think about values or not, they drive your behavior. As professor Joel Urbany and his colleagues remind us, the Nobel prize-winning research of Daniel Kahneman found that failure to evaluate values trade-offs is one of the major traps in decision-making. (1) For example, Professor Joel Urbany invites you to consider that the athlete's decision to use steroids is really a values-based choice between short-term achievement and honesty or integrity.

Ethics refers to the rules or standards governing how human beings ought to act in various situations. There are several approaches leaders can take when deciding what standards to use when developing their ethical platform. However, the virtue or value approach is what leaders find most useful. It states that there are specific values that, when practice consistently, improve leadership performance. My research has found that the following five values are the ones best linked to leadership success:

- Honesty -- Being truthful, frank, and free from deceit.

- Integrity -- Being whole, undivided, and completeness.

- Humility -- Being modest in your estimate of your importance.

- Equity -- Being fair and impartial.

- Authenticity -- Being genuine, uncorrupted from the original.

How well do you use these values in your day-to-day decision-making? Is there a simple and effective way to make values count in your everyday decisions? Professor Urbany and his colleagues created a decision mapping process to answer these questions. The table below is my variation of his map:

Choice Options. When making a decision involving values, the first step is to assume that you have at least two choices. Our athlete can choose to take steroids or not.

Short-term Consequences. What are the pluses and minuses you might experience immediately from each choice? If our athlete takes steroids, he may experience enhanced performance but he could also be caught cheating. If he doesn't take steroids, he'll probably feel better about himself but he may not make the team.

Long-term Consequences. What are the pluses and minuses you might experience over the long haul from each choice? Leaders have also found it helpful to ask about the long-term, unintended consequences that might be experienced from each choice. The long-term consequences of our athlete using steroids include the prestige of winning. However, there is considerable evidence that the negative side effects of steroid use are severe. The long-term consequences of not taking steroids include better health, but with less money.

Values/Goals. Every decision is a means to the end. The values/goals column asks you to identify the values and goals behind the decision. Notice that the consideration of values occurs at the end your analysis.

The “confirmation bias” is one of the decision-making traps leaders fall into when making the value decisions. This occurs because we have a tendency to focus on the positive consequences of our initially preferred choice and the negative consequences of the other. We see only what we want to see, thus confirming our bias. Apply the value mapping process to help you remove this bias. How surprised will you be when you find you are living your values in your everyday decisions?

Keep stretching,

Dave

1. Joel Urbany and colleagues; How to Make Values Count in Everyday Decisions, ‘MIT Sloan Management Review,’ Summer 2008, 75 - 80.